New addition to our family!

On June 23rd, Derek and I got a puppy! He is a puggle (pug/beagle mix) and his name is Dexter! He is now 9 weeks old and is such a good boy! We have been wanting a dog for a while now and finally got one! It is exhausting to have a puppy, but definately worth it! He really is my baby! Derek and his dad really love him too! Derek, who never wanted a small dog, is so attached and calls Dexter "his boy"! My father in law has fallen into the typical "grandpa" role, showing Dexter off to anyone who comes to the house and letting him play with things he shouldn't be playing with (like shoes)! It has been so fun and rewarding so far! I have also learned that when we have babies(which won't be for a while, we need to spoil this little guy now) that Derek and I will be partners and work together well in raising our kids!!

One Year and Still Going Strong!!

On June 12th Derek and I celebrated our one year anniversary!! We decided to spend the weekend in Park City at the Newpark Resort!

We left around 4:00 p.m. on Friday afternoon. Driving up to Park City was pretty intense and scary as it was raining really hard, so we were really relieved when we pulled up to the hotel! We were so excited when we walked into our hotel room! It was amazing - complete with a huge tub, shower, double sinks, kitchen, amazing king size bed, and our own hot tub! We were in heaven!! We decided to hang out at the hotel the first night! We ordered food, watched TV and hung out in the hot tub!

The next day, Saturday, it was still raining. We decided to go check out the outlet malls! Derek found some shirts and a backpack at the Oakley store ad I got extremely lucky and found a purse at the Coach outlet for an amazing price! After the outlet malls we went bowling and later to dinner! We were going to try and go to the same restaurant we went to the day we got engaged, but they were switching shift and not serving hot food when we got there, so we went to a pizza place instead! We spend the rest of the night in the hot tub, lounging around, and of course, eating the traditional piece of wedding cake!

We were so sad to leave on Sunday and wished we could have moved into the hotel! We felt so lucky to be able to spend some time together there! Even if it was raining the whole time, it was so nice to be carefree! At one point I told Derek that we need all the things the hotel had at our house because of how stress free we were. Derek replied by saying that he was stressed. Stressed because he had to choose between taking a bathtub bath or hot tub bath! This pretty much sums up the weekend!

Aside from having a relaxing weekend, I was also so excited to be celebrating one year of being married. Derek and I have been through so much together, and I feel blessed everyday that I am married to him! I love him so much and look forward to celebrating many more anniversaries with him!!

The top of our wedding cake, one year later!

Our Amazing bed! I actually emailed the hotel to see what kind of mattress it was because we slept so well!

Birthday, Wendover and Babies!

Since Derek and I started dating we have celebrated three of his birthdays! I love traditions, so I always try to make his day important!

The first birthday we celebrated for Derek was his 21st! I was so excited to throw him a party. Not just any party, but a paintball themed one complete with paintball themed decorations and all the guests wearing camouflage! I loved doing that for him!

On his next birthday, his 22nd, I didn’t throw him a party, but I still tried to make his day special. Decorations, nice dinner, nice presents and a cake from Dairy Queen, his favorite, completed did the job.

This year was different. Derek is working two jobs, and had to work his entire birthday. On top of that, he got some computer parts a few weeks before his birthday for his present, so I couldn’t even go shopping for a gift. I was so bummed! I decided that I was going to make him a cake from scratch for his birthday! A deadly chocolate cake with chocolate ganache to be exact! The cake came out of the bundt pan perfectly (this never happens!) and I set it on the beautifully covered plate. I iced the entire cake with the ganache! Not until the end did I decide to taste the ganache! It tasted horrible (I had bought the wrong chocolate). There was no way to scrape the ganache off, so I had to cut half of the cake (bawling the whole time). What should have looked like this…

…looked like a big ugly donut! I was devastated, but my cute husband came home and didn’t even notice how horrible the cake looked. Instead, he was so appreciative of me even making a cake for him! Even though I know it matters more to me then it does him, I still wish I would have been able to make him a beautiful cake, but I am so happy that I have a husband that is appreciative for the small things!

Because we weren’t able to celebrate his birthday on his actual day, we decided that we would go to Wendover with our friends Andy and Aryn. Andy’s birthday is exactly a week before Derek’s, so we decided that it would be a birthday trip for them! We stayed at the Montego Bay! I only took a few pictures because I forgot that I had my camera until end, but we had a fun time! I lost six dollars in the penny slots and gave up! Derek played black jack for a while and ended up winning $35 (Go baby!) I was so excited to be able to take a bath (we only have a shower at our place) and I think Derek was excited to sleep in a king size bed so he didn’t have to sleep on the edge with me taking up the whole thing! Overall, it was a fun trip and I want to go back!

Our Room...

...and our view :)

On another note, I am so excited to have one (and almost one more) baby in my family! My cousin’s wife had her little girl on April 6th and my other cousin is having her little boy any day! I love holding these new babies and plan on becoming their favorite “aunt”!

I love my hubby!

For the last couple of days I have been feeling bad for myself because I don’t have my mom. I went to two showers this weekend for my cousins. I am so incredibly excited for my cousins, but at the same time I couldn’t help but feel sad that I won’t have my mom at my shower or to shop with me for baby things. (No, this doesn’t mean that we are going to have kids anytime soon. I am just a planner so I’m always thinking of the future. ) I am lucky to have family that is so willing to help me, but there are some things you only want to do with your mom like shop for nursing bras! Right in the middle of feeling sad I got mad at myself. I am so blessed to have the family and the husband that I do to support me. I love my family so much, but right now I need to take the time to explain why I am so lucky to have my husband and “publicly” thank him. I don’t tell him enough how much he means to me.

I love Derek! From the second we met we “clicked”! Pretty soon, he was introduced to my crazy life. I met him about four months after my mom passed away. Obviously, the emotions were very fresh and we were going through a lot. He was so sensitive about everything, and still is! Derek had to take on o much more than normal boyfriends do. He had to comfort me from emotional breakdowns, physically help with things around the house, moving, understanding that the role I had taken on was not a normal one, etc, etc. Not once did he complain. When we got engaged I had help from family and friends, but there are some things that you only want to do with your mom. Derek did whatever he could fill the void I was feeling. My sports loving, ESPN watching, paintball playing husband now knows more about the color “lapis”, wedding invitations and bridal showers than I think he ever wanted to! He never once complained. He works so hard to make sure that we are secure and happy. Without him, I don’t know if I would be able to still be in school. He knows how important it is to me and how important it was to my mom so he won’t let me quit! He pushes me to do my best! He is always there to talk some sense into me when I start to freak out, cuddle me when I’m sad and make me feel special! I look forward to the time of day when we are both home together! I love being with him!

Derek is my best friend! I know he’ll be mad at me for posting this because it will embarrass him, but I wanted him and everyone else to know how much he means to me! I know that when the time comes to have children, Even though it will be difficult going through it without my mom, Derek will be there. I am so lucky to have him to share it with! I know even though he may not want to, he will be there to help me with whatever I need, even if this means shopping for nursing bras!

3 years...

It has been three years since my mom passed away. I think about her every day, but obviously this day brings about so many memories. Losing her brought so many trials and “firsts” to me. The first important paper I ever signed was the one that said not to resuscitate her, the first funeral I planned was hers, my first writing that was ever published was her obituary, and the first piece of land I owned was her grave plot. This was not how I expected things to happen. No matter how hard these trials were, I would not give up the time I was so fortunate to spend with her. My mom was the most selfless person I have ever met. She did everything for my sister and me, including live. (On February 14th, 2007 my mom was told that she was very sick and most likely would not make it. My family had heard that numerous times before during her hospital ordeal, but this was the first time she heard it. She was so tired, but was adamant on fighting for us. She told a nurse that she was ready to go, but was so worried about my sister and me. It wasn’t until we said goodbye and let her know that we would be ok that she let go.)

It can be so easy to focus on the negative and bad memories of her being sick in the hospital. It can be so easy to feel bad for yourself. (Believe me, I have done enough of this in the past week as I have decided it is a good idea to watch Terms of Endearment and listen to James Taylor and Carly Simon in the car. I’m pretty sure Derek and passing motorists are tired of me bawling!) I don’t want to remember that time or how my mom was so sick and helpless. Instead, I want to remember my mom as she was when she wasn’t sick.

My mom was the funniest person! She was known for always being able to come up with a sarcastic remark. I remember one time, soon after the Super Bowl with the Janet Jackson incident, Janet was on T.V. Without missing a beat my mom yelled at the T.V. “Hey Janet, flip us a nip!” There were always funny comments like that! She was also known for sending out fake Christmas letters. She would put things in them such as “Jen is finally potty trained” (mind you I was 17) or “Holly is finally on parole”. She was also the woman who “lobbied” for coke can holders in the chapel at church! There are so many funny stories! Not many people know this, but she was such a humorous and amazing writer that she actually had her work published in newspapers!

My mom was incredibly sensitive. She cried at every sappy commercial, movie, song or story. (I definitely take after her in that aspect, as I can’t make it through McDonalds, Hallmark or Onstar commercials without crying!) Because she was so sensitive, she was also intuitive to other people’s needs and feelings! She would leave little notes in our lunches, write us letters on holidays and even pick up flowers for us if we had surgery! She was also very approachable and a good listener! Not only would she listen to our problems, strangers would also find her safe to confide in! She would go to Macey’s and the cashier would tell my mom about her boyfriend problems, or the man at Taco Bell would tell her all about his headache. She genuinely cared about people’s feelings. This is why she was such as good teacher and friend.


My mom was a hard worker and selfless. Everything she did or had was for my sister and me. When we struggled, my mom swallowed her pride numerous times to make sure we were taken care of. She made every holiday special for us. Up until she passed away, she was still decorating for birthdays (always putting a sign on the door) and making sure we had “Santa” presents at Christmas.


My mom was amazing. I will succeed as a parent if I am only a fraction as good as she was. I miss her so much it physically hurts and I fall apart sometimes, but I was so incredibly blessed to have her in my life for as long as I did!


P.S. I asked people on facebook to leave a memory of my mom. These are just a few:



· “I have so many loving and great memories of my beautiful aunt. The one that always sticks out in my head is when I was very young and she was babysitting me. The night before I got a black eye from running into a wood couch. The next day she took me shopping and I was carrying, or I should say dragging her purse. In her crazy sense of humor she said, “quit crying, or I’ll blacken your other eye.” You should have seen the looks we got from people.”

· “When we were kids, every summer when we were out of school, Kathy would run and 2 hour daycare/school for kids at our house. She was born to be the coolest teacher that she was.”

· “I remember talking to your mom for hours on the phone. We always laughed so hard, my sides hurt. We used to laugh about stupid Seinfeld episodes and ridiculous politicians. Kathy always had the greatest jokes. She was so keenly observant of people and had such a wry sense of humor.”

· “Kathy has the sharpest wit of any person I have ever met. I can remember her "little kitty" jokes. She always said she was going to write a book about Sloanie and his little kitty tennis shoes and his little kitty lunchbox. I will never forget when she decided Sloan should learn to fetch. We spent about three hours in the family room of our old house laughing our guts out. She was on all fours on the floor and I would toss the ring off of a milk carton and she would scramble over and pick the ring up in her mouth and bring it back to me. I will be danged if she didn't teach Sloanie how to fetch by example.”

·”I remember her telling Pamela and Rob the Little red riding hood story and acting out the whole thing. I remember nights of us sneaking treats to our room and seeing who could get up the stairs to get a coke out of the fridge without my mom hearing. We would wait until she was in the tub. It was all very technical.”

· “I remember having her called as Young Women's secretary when I was serving as president. During the sacrament meeting when she was to be sustained, she passed a note up to me (through LOTS of people) that read: "Oh by the way, I DON'T CAMP!!!" I loved her sense of humor!”

·I'll never forget when you guys would come to my grandparents on Sunday night and one time she parked in the driveway and everyone gave her such a hard time for taking someone else’s (supposed) parking space, we joked about it a lot after that whenever she would come over.”

· “The thing that stands out the most was her laugh. She had an incredible laugh and it seemed that when she was around there was also plenty of laughter. ♥”

Slacker!!

I love to look at other people's blogs, but I am horrible at updating my own! I guess I just assumed that nothing really exciting has happened! Looking back over the past year, I realized that my life has been pretty exciting over the last year! To recap:

We got married!

Not only was the wedding day amazing, but so were all of the events that lead up to the day!

Showers:

Bachelorette Party:

Taking Engagement and Bridal pictures:

And finally, the best day of all, the Wedding...

... and the honeymoon:

Looking over the past year since I last updated my blog, I realized that a lot of really good things have happened! I am so happy and so in love with my husband. He keeps me sane and will do anything for me! I am excited about things to come in our future, and I will try to stay better at up dating my blog, even if I do think things are boring!

Christmas!

I am still getting used to blogging, but I wanted to do a recap of my Christmas! Christmas is a very emotional time for me, but it is also a time where I realize just how lucky I am. I was so excited to go downtown with Holly and Derek! This is a tradition that I just adore.

My sister and I started out our Christmas eve by taking care packages to the families of patients at the ICU or surgery at St. Marks. We have spent Christmas in the hospital and we know just how depressing it can be. It felt so nice to let those people who are so worried about their family members know that there are people thinking about them. We handed a treat bag an older lady who was in the waiting room and she started to cry. It touched me so much, but also made my heart break for her because I knew how bad she was hurting. I held back my tears until we walked into the actual ICU and saw the room my mom was in. That was so hard and brought back so many memories - some happy and some not so happy- but it was good for me to go back there. I still remember all of the things people did for us and all of the miracles that happened during the time my mom was so sick. I think visiting the hospital on Christmas Eve is a tradition that I would like to continue for years to come to help others and remind myself where I have been.

After going to the hospital I was happy to go hang out with my Aunt Karen and Uncle Terry and my cousins for dinner. I feel so blessed and appreciate so much my Aunt Karen, Uncle Terry and my cousins Matt, Jess and Tyson taking us in as there children and sisters. I consider them my second parents and my brothers and sister. We had so much fun just hanging out together. I slept over on Christmas Eve and was so excited to get up on Christmas morning and open stockings. Karen put together stockings for all of her kids and their significant others. I think she was up to 8 or so stockings this year!

We went down to my cousin's house for Christmas lunch. It was so scary driving down there because it was one of the worst snow storms I have seen in a while! Once we all got down there safely it was so nice to hang out with the rest of my fam!

Later in the afternoon we went and visited Derek's dad and then his mom. It was nice and calm with them. I was excited because I got to see his cute nephews and niece and see his sister's new house. I am also happy that I am getting to know his family more! We had an amazing dinner at his mom's house as we always do! We even got eclair cake , so needless to say we were happy and full!

After visiting all of the family Holly , Derek and I came back to my apartment and opened our presents for each other. It was nice to hang out with each other. I got some good stuff too! My life is complete with a Magic Bullet and Guitar Hero. Derek also got me a Dooney and Bourke purse! I love it so much, but I think I love the effort he put into getting it more! I saw this purse online and I liked the black and the brown, but both colors were back ordered. Derek searched all over online to find the purse I wanted to surprise me!

I had a great Christmas. As Derek and I talk more about wedding plans and who we want involved it feels so good to realize how many people know and love us!